Published: 07/02/2018 - Updated: 12/23/2018
Author: MSc. Miriam Reyes
If you live every day with thoughts like: “When I accomplish this or that, I’m going to…” or “When I have this or that I’ll be able to…”, you’re actually living your day for this or that, you’re living then and not now.
Wanting and desiring is natural
Working to obtain what we wants nourishes our creativity and develops new skills in us. The wish to transform things fuels our progress. Wanting and creating is not the root of the problem, but rather, it’s the harmful attitude that we can’t be happy and satisfied right now until we fulfill this particular desire.
Those that live focused solely on fulfilling dreams
Living outside of this moment, constantly dreaming about how to achieve something, living in a hurry and often times anxiety, obstacles that cause frustration and despair, cause bad moods and irritability, especially when a situation in this present moment is distracting your attention from your goal. Living solely to pursue a goal creates distance from the present moment, and you become immersed in some far off land where happiness and peace only exist when you achieve your goal. By being completely distanced from the present moment, you search for fleeting pleasures, comfort through food or drink, you need pastimes and distractions that – in the grand scheme of things – does not elevate the spirit, but simply calms and removes our anguish and dissatisfaction, silencing for a moment lack of needing much more to be happy.
I know that the phrase “take some time for yourself” easily goes through one ear and out the other; to some, stopping and taking time means losing time, money, clients, fame, friends, image, etc. But underneath this excuse is something you should consider: your desire could be forcing you to avoid the present moment, because it’s in this moment that you can become conscious of yourself and of what your truly feel. Perhaps this hurry and your desires to do something don’t let you see that, underneath, there’s something that makes you even happier than what you’re trying or doing. Frequently we avoid the present with our anticipations because dealing with this moment makes us take a look at ourselves, and deeply listening to ourselves implies, many times, changes, dealing with new situations and experiences, saying no to those that you always wanted to please, and saying yes to what you truly want. To quiet yourself and take some time for reflection frequently allows you to see that you may need to start again from zero or make an important change to what you do. But above all, this means looking at your weaknesses and faults, which takes great strength, understanding, and most importantly, that you be a strong friend to yourself.
Giving yourself time to truly be with yourself and what you feel is what gives life a deeper meaning. Life becomes more and more beautiful and pleasant as we discover ourselves and we dare to do what truly satisfies us. Life is equally as cold, boring, and unpleasant as we are distanced from ourselves; if we approach ourselves, so too, does life. If we distance and avoid ourselves, our lives will reflect it. The more conscious you are of yourself and of what you feel and think, the more you will be in this moment, as you will enjoy and live that much more fully. That is the difference between living and truly living.
Revised by: Dra. Loredana Lunadei on 12/23/2018
About the author