How to know if he likes you and what to do if not

Whenever someone catches your eye and you feel attracted to having a relationship beyond just being friends or acquaintances, you could start having doubts about whether or not the person likes you.

A lot of times it’s easy to tell whether or not you attract the other person, because it is usually pretty evident by flirting, like glances, smiles, loving words and details, but that’s not always the case.  It could be that whomever you like is a timid or insecure person, or one that fears rejection or doesn’t really know clearly what he/she feels.

If that’s the case, don’t worry.  It’s quite common for messages not to be so clear, but you can discover what they truly feel if you practice the following tricks and learn to observe body language.  There are movements and words that show that someone likes you, as well as body language that quickly tells when someone doesn’t like you.  So take a good look at whoever it is that you like and, if they don’t show signs of liking you, you might be able to conquer their heart slowly by following this advice.

How to know if he/she likes you

• If they only talk about themselves whenever you talk to them, and don’t ask that many questions about your life, this is a sign that they are not attracted to you and that you don’t interest them very much.  But if that’s your case and you really like that person, you have one hope: learn to listen to them and try to be truly interested in what he or she talks to you about.  Reach out a little bit and don’t expect them to listen to you or understand you, avoid judging or criticizing them, and try to give them some sort of advice on how to be happy.  Taking interest in their happiness without needing anything else in exchange is actually very seductive.
• If you’re with a group of friends and he or she looks at you several times, this is a sign that he/she likes you.
• If you can tell that they aren’t very worried about impressing you, or they don’t make any efforts to get close to you, this is evidence that they aren’t attracted to you.  If this is your case, you run the risk of idealizing this person, because surely you don’t know them very well and you don’t know who they really are.  Your crush could be more of a “fantasy”.  The best thing to do in this situation is to find an opportune moment and get close, yourself.  Start a conversation about anything.  If you notice that he/she is not very interested, don’t force it, and say goodbye in a friendly manner before they say goodbye to you.  Try to get close a few other times, but don’t try to talk to them about something super flashy to surprise them.  It’s best to try something simple.  Make a short comment about something you like (like a movie), tell them that what they’re wearing looks good on them, ask their help with something, etc.  If they take advantage of this to start a conversation with you, then there are possibilities.  
• If they don’t look you directly in the eyes when you talk to them, or if they quickly turn to the other side, they aren’t really that interested.  In this case, it’s best to get close to him or her with a friendly tone.  If you try to be his or her friend you might achieve more than trying to conquer them.  Avoid expecting a lot from him/her if they don’t seem very interested.  When someone isn’t interested in you, it’s best to learn how to give without expecting anything.  Don’t have high expectations because this might just scare off whoever it is that you like.
• If they look at your eyes with great interest, but then later seem distant, it could be that they are timid.  In this case, you’ll have to take the initiative to get closer to him/her little by little.
• If they frequently mention your name while chatting, this is a sign that they like you.
• If they give you long answers when you ask him/her something, they are interested in you.  If they answer you dryly or give you short answers, this means the opposite.

But most of all, you need to be patient.  Sooner or later, when two people like each other, the moment and opportunity will arise.  But if you notice that their actions are confusing or unclear, it’s best to motivate yourself and invite them directly to go out.  Fear of losing something can truly make you miss valuable opportunities.  So get going.  At the end of the day the only thing you can lose is doubt.

Revised by: Dra. Loredana Lunadei on 12/31/2017

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